


Love is stored in the lunch.

by deepandlovelydark



Category: Nero Wolfe - Rex Stout
Genre: Comedy, Domestic Fluff, Food, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:41:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28661157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deepandlovelydark/pseuds/deepandlovelydark
Summary: Fritz has been anticipating a request for something special in the way of meals, for this anniversary. Wolfe and Goodwin should expect nothing less for the celebration of their consummation.But did they have to make such wildly contradictory requests?
Relationships: Archie Goodwin/Nero Wolfe
Comments: 9
Kudos: 11
Collections: Chocolate Box - Round 6





	Love is stored in the lunch.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [anabel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anabel/gifts).



"Love," Nero says, with his most ponderous tone, "does sometimes require sacrifice."

It is on the tip of Fritz's tongue to say that Wolfe is hardly that type, that a great part of his appeal is his steady, comfortable pooh-poohing of anything so mortifying as expressing need rather than tasteful desire, but he's a discreet man. He waits for follow up.

"You know Archie is in the habit of resorting to twenty-four hour delis, for those...sandwiches. With corned beef and rye bread. I won't expect you to prepare it, touch it, interact with it in any way whatsoever, I merely beg for your indulgence in obtaining the necessary ingredients and accepting that a culinary atrocity will be prepared under a roof that you share."

"Mr Wolfe," Fritz assures him, "not for any one else. But for Archie Goodwin, I will let the matter pass without complaint."

Nero pursues his lips, and nods with the gravity of a man who has just finished negotiating an international treaty.

***

"Shad roe," Archie says, sipping his evening glass of milk. 

"Perhaps detest is too strong a word, but my impression is that you find the dish less than satisfactory."

"Well, sure, but that's not the point. What matters is- there's only so much you can do for the man who has everything, you understand? I already put my life on the line for him, he has enough orchids to keep the debutantes of New York fixed up for the season, anything I do isn't going to amount to anything except as a token gesture." Archie finishes the milk, stares off into the distance with the mild contented glow that's become his this last year. "Shad roe is a gesture like that. He'll know what it means."

In his entire culinary career, Fritz thinks, he has never heard of such a crime against menu protocol and sheer good sense as starting with a shad roe course and proceeding to corned beef on rye.

He argues the point; but Archie is a stubborn, persistent man.

That would be how he partnered with Wolfe, of course.

***

When the glorious day comes, Fritz's heart fails him.

Never mind courses. He cleans off the turkey roasting pan, uses the gravy divider to separate appetizer on one side and main course into the other, carries it into the dining room.

He can hardly bear to look at them, proffering this disastrous combination; but they don't seem to find it so. There is laughter. Hands are held. Small murmuring words of affection are exchanged, and nobody even starting on the food.

Fritz escapes into the kitchen, where his own lunch of cold pressed duck on wild rice awaits him, and marvels over the sheer blindness of love.


End file.
